Today I am looking for parenting advice.  It has come to my attention lately that my kids are, for lack of a better term, a bunch of weirdos.  Don't get me wrong, I love my little weirdos (think - mama grizzlie mauling off your face and consuming your carcass if you mess with my cubs kind of love).  But they are weirdos none the less.  But I don't worry much about it because they can't help it.  Their parents are weirdos too.  Which also doesn't bother me too much any more.  To be honest, the more I think about it, the more I think all of ya'll are weirdos too.  Don't get your feelings hurt, I still love ya like red velvet cake, but don't be confused.  One man's idiosyncrasies are another man's "wow that dude is a freak".  It's cool.  
    But back to the subject at hand.  Does anyone have any experience with a baby that is adorable, and cute, and wonderful, and funny, and interactive, and smart, and bad to the bone?  Destruct-o-girl has decided that pitching fits (the laying on the floor screaming, spinning in a circle, snotting, drooling, thrashing kind) are in some way rewarding for her.  I know that doesn't make her weird, just bad, but she has lately taken up a new method of rebellion.  Apparently she knows that I really value the adorable bows and clips and whatnot I put in her crazy, flowing hair.  So if she is mad, the first thing she does is give me a deranged "I'll show you" face, and then she rips her bow out.  Just rips, hair and all.  It's ridonculous.  Please see below to understand what I mean.
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Cheese!! Aren't I a little cutie poo? I'm so sweet. I love you mama.
And only moments later.........
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Whadoyou MEAN I can't have a ring pop. I said I want a RING POP. Do you know who I am?! I run this joint. It is so on like donkey kong.
And then there is the curious case of Turnanator.  He is a lovely, shy boy who is seriously gonna make the girls all ga-ga one day with his good looks and nonchalant attitude.  And he's so kind to his baby sister.  Just a little dear.  Unless you try to make him wear socks that bunch up, or a dress coat, or a sweater vest, or a hat.  Or unless you tell him to turn off Ben 10 Alien Force, or make him clean up the playroom (oh, the horrors of the playroom!  but that's a post for another day).  Then he turns into psycho, can't deal with life, I'd rather end it all now than endure the pain of what is happening to me at this second boy.  Case in point
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Why do I have to help you clean out my closet?! I can't try on all those clothes! It hurts me! It really hurts me and it feels funny and I don't like it and can I please just watch scooby doo and don't let Gib get my water and I don't want tooooooooooooo
And finally there is my oldest.  My first born.  The recipient of my very first feeling of motherly love.  He is funny and smart and forgets nothing and loves his mama and is a really good helper.  And he whines.  A lot.  He's also a total attention hog.  I have no idea where he gets either one of those traits.  (don't you hate it when you see your very worst traits coming out in your own children and then you're eaten up with all that guilt that you passed on something that makes life rougher on them?!)  Just to prove what a turkey he is, here is a photo of him wearing a pair of pantyhose stuffed with balloons on his head.  Yep - poor boy, he's just like his mother.
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Sorry I forgot to turn this picture over before I loaded it on here and now I'm to lazy to go back and fix it. But isn't he adorable?
There you have it.  My freaky-deaky weirdo children that I love, adore, worry about, pray for, clean up after, and wipe snot off of.  Any advice for whining, ocd freakouts, or hairbow destroying fits besides physical abuse.  They may or may not have been tried more than once around here.  But only maybe. I would love your comments, encouragement or sympathy so load me up.  Or don't.  Either way I'm about to go eat some cadburry eggs to feel better about the whole thing anyhow.
Laura Crocker
4/13/2011 08:53:11 am

Oh Cassie, how you make me laugh til my stomach hurts! Haha! And I am so glad that I have gotten to witness, first hand, the little quirks of all three of your precious children possess. It's quite hilarious for those of us who did not give them birth! I love y'all!

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Johnny P
4/13/2011 09:03:29 am

Momma Cass,
I can't believe you would make up all that stuff about your sweet children. Davis being destructive? Turner being quirky??? Gib whining???? Oh the horror!!!!!

Love the blog, no matter what ACE says I think its cool.....

JP

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Lee Ann Grisham
4/13/2011 10:10:19 am

I laughed so hard at this! I thought my boys were the only ones that did some of these things!! I don't have a little girl (hope this one is a girl) but Will is whiney and he acts like it is the end of the world if I ask him to do anything....doing homework..oh my goodness!! Everyone else thinks he is soooo sweet and lovable and he is really but here at home sometimes I wait on his head to start rotating on his shoulders haha. And Brayden....omg...he is soooo mean sometimes but then when he thinks you are mad, he comes and crawls in your lap and says "I sorry Moma, I love you, You are bootiful moma" haha then it is right back to turning the garbage over, kicking lightbulbs until they shatter tearing paper up into itty bitty shreds and throwing them around the entire room he is in at the moment....so don't feel alone!! I am scared to death to think of what this next one has in store for dear old mother lol....Love ya girl and I hope to see you soon!! you will have to come visit me sometime and keep me company while I am on bedrest for the next seven and a half months!! I will go crazy for sure if friends don't come to my rescue!!!

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4/13/2011 01:09:45 pm

At least you don't have a child who laughs when you pop her hand for doing something she shouldn't. She just laughs and does it again! The worst part is she just turned 1. I hate thinking about what I have to look forward to.

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Kara
4/13/2011 11:53:32 pm

Everyone is weird in some way or another! You ate in luck, I happen to love weirdos! No really, I have always loved to be around "different" people. Does that something about me? Like . . . I'm weird? Probably! Love you all!!

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